I caught my girlfriend [CENSORED] pooping...She said shes off to pee while were watching a movie, now shes been gone 5 minutes and i knew something was up, i knocked on the door and asked if everything is ok, she said yes she'll be right out...her voice was labored and i became suspicious...so i yelled "IM COMING IN!' she screamed no but there was no stopping this, i smashed through the door and i see her sitting on the toilet seat, i told her to get the [CENSORED] up, she didnt so i threw her off, i looked inside the toilet...just as i suspected, a goddam log, [CENSORED] u better pray this isnt yours. i looked around and saw no pet in site, I KNOW THIS IS UR POOP U [CENSORED], she screamed at me that im crazy and that shes calling the cops, all the while toilet paper in her hands. i told her no need to call the cops, im breaking up with u u some kinda poop [CENSORED]. and that was that. I feel like a new man and off to find a woman who doesnt poop
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